It is still fulfilling!! I thought I would be dying to go back to work by now, but hell, the domestic spirit was still going strong. You housewives out there are still rolling your eyes... yes? Heehee. Fine, I'll let you in on something honest then, and we'll high-five.
I was exhausted by Friday on the first week. Like, BURNT. OUT. But I think it was more to the adrenaline rush burn-out. I still went about on my daily routine, just more tired. I skipped sweeping. Big deal. So there, housework is tiring. It never ends, like a city that never sleeps. There are always things in the sink to be washed, always things on the floor to be picked up (especially when you have kids), always have clothes to wash, dry and fold, and always cooking. BUT... it still felt fulfilling. And I think it's because of...
The mindset you have from the beginning. If you are doing it for love, you will feel fulfilled and rewarded. Previously, my mindset was, I HAVE to do it because my maid is on leave. Then it comes a chore and a bore, and you get angry when you get tired, and you start snapping at your kids, and get mad at the husband for not helping. So my mindset this time was totally different. I WANTED to do it, and I wanted to do it for the love. And it.was.awesome. Tired but happy, like after a great vacation.
This second week was also the school holidays, so I got to spend the days with Daniel, who actually helped me fold the laundry and clean the garden. What an awesome kid!! Because I didn't force him to! Hahaha! On the first day, he volunteered to fold the clothes, and I was like "Yeah, this one and ONLY time. You think it's fun". Of course, some needed refolding because I'm a perfectionist. Then on the second day, he naturally, matter-of-factly lugged all the clothes to the living room without being asked, and he started folding them while watching TV. HOMAIGOD. Like a housewife! My heart dissolved into a pile of goo. Apart from laundry, he also collected all the dried mango tree leaves on the garden. The tree belongs to my neighbour and some branches are lushly extending to my compound. I didn't know we have autumn here in Malaysia because the leaves have been falling like crazy! We also had to sweep the road outside our house because although leaves are part of nature, it does look unsightly on the road when there are too many.
Then came Sunday. My last day as Domestic Goddess. Frankly, I felt a little sad. My maid came back and took over the tasks I was enjoying for the past 2 weeks. Suddenly, I felt, "How can I survive going back to work?" Most of all, I am going to miss all the little moments with my baby. Little moments that I have cherished from being at home with him. I call them Swollen Heart Nuggets because it is like brief moments happening a few times a day that makes my heart swell with warmth, gratitude and love. Simple and small things and they all involve his big puppy eyes looking at me. Oh, I am so crying right now. He is never going to be 3 forever.
I know you are going to suggest I quit my job for good. But it is easier said than done. However, I am seriously thinking about it. Seriously. These two weeks has been nothing but rewarding, educational and joyous to me. How can anyone rave about being a housewife?
Can.
ps. It also felt tremendously good to be away from my computer for 2 weeks.
2 comments:
I do prefer staying at home and taking care of my household chores instead of coming to work. However, financially that will not be good to me. Although my husband can pay for household things, I may not have my own money to shop as and when I wish.
Perhaps you can check with your office if they do allow flexi working hour for you, eg, with a paycut and perhaps work 2-3 days in a week. My company does allow that.
Sally
My boss is kind enough to allow flexi-hours :) and that's good enough for me.
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