What I'm about to say, has probably happened to many married ladies out there at some point of their married life. Some keep to themselves and carry on with their daily lives, some joke about it.
Last night, the husband and I were chatting a bit in bed before sleep. I had this uneasy feeling I didn't know why. We talked about some usual bla bla stuff and then came to the topic of Tiger Woods and cheating. There was a pause for a while. Then out of the blue, he said in a low guilty tone,
"I'm sorry"
Silence. My heart skipped a beat.
Then it hit me. HARD.
THE STINKIEST MOST CONCENTRATED PUNGENT MIND-DIZZYING FART.
Oh, the uneasy feeling I had was probably from the chilli fries, chocolate ice cream, bread, prunes and keropok I had simultaneously.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
I Forgot...
... I have a blog. Thank you placenta brain.
Like they say, second trimester is the best time of a pregnancy. I was up and about, crafting a lot, made wedding invites, cooked a bit, decorated my home a bit, ate a lot, gained some good weight, man, I wanted to do everything!
My favourite part is the eating bit. I have never had ravenous appetite before. The unpregnant me wished to eat a lot, but somehow I just can't. Now, I see cheesecake, I wallop. I can really eat and I love it!! In fact, during my 5th month, I gained 5 kg within a month or less. I was like "WOO HOO! COWABUNGA!" but the doctor was concerned about the rapid gain. Damn! Spoiler.
I'm entering the third dimension... I mean trimester. It feels heavier and heavier. Getting up from sitting position now requires 2 million calories and 50 billions ATPs ( energy compounds for those who forgotten their Biologi ), bullshit by the way, but it DOES feel like that. The human body is amazing don't you think.
I have to sleep early too. By the time I say '...and the dragon lived sadly alone, forever and ever. The end ", I konk out before Daniel has the time to ask me why this bedtime story sucks. Speaking of bedtime, my bedtime ritual is rubbing cocoa butter all over my belly. Nice. From previous experience, it helps with the itching and dryness.
Lately, the fetus has been hiccuping. So cute. If you're curious, here's why:
"...only more mature fetuses hiccup in the womb because their central nervous system is adequately developed in order to allow this to happen. It is believed that the fetus breathes in amniotic fluid or drinks it. When this happens and the amniotic fluid enters and exits the fetus lungs then the diaphragm contracts and hiccups results. Fetal hiccups appear to be extremely normal ..."
What else... ah, contractions. Do not panic! They're just Braxton-Hicks, they come and go now and then, few times a day. It feels like a tightening of the belly, like a 'practice contraction' or toning of the uteral muscles in preparation of labour. This also means, I should drink more water and sit down for a while...
..and the use 50 billions ATPs to get up.
Like they say, second trimester is the best time of a pregnancy. I was up and about, crafting a lot, made wedding invites, cooked a bit, decorated my home a bit, ate a lot, gained some good weight, man, I wanted to do everything!
My favourite part is the eating bit. I have never had ravenous appetite before. The unpregnant me wished to eat a lot, but somehow I just can't. Now, I see cheesecake, I wallop. I can really eat and I love it!! In fact, during my 5th month, I gained 5 kg within a month or less. I was like "WOO HOO! COWABUNGA!" but the doctor was concerned about the rapid gain. Damn! Spoiler.
I'm entering the third dimension... I mean trimester. It feels heavier and heavier. Getting up from sitting position now requires 2 million calories and 50 billions ATPs ( energy compounds for those who forgotten their Biologi ), bullshit by the way, but it DOES feel like that. The human body is amazing don't you think.
I have to sleep early too. By the time I say '...and the dragon lived sadly alone, forever and ever. The end ", I konk out before Daniel has the time to ask me why this bedtime story sucks. Speaking of bedtime, my bedtime ritual is rubbing cocoa butter all over my belly. Nice. From previous experience, it helps with the itching and dryness.
Lately, the fetus has been hiccuping. So cute. If you're curious, here's why:
"...only more mature fetuses hiccup in the womb because their central nervous system is adequately developed in order to allow this to happen. It is believed that the fetus breathes in amniotic fluid or drinks it. When this happens and the amniotic fluid enters and exits the fetus lungs then the diaphragm contracts and hiccups results. Fetal hiccups appear to be extremely normal ..."
What else... ah, contractions. Do not panic! They're just Braxton-Hicks, they come and go now and then, few times a day. It feels like a tightening of the belly, like a 'practice contraction' or toning of the uteral muscles in preparation of labour. This also means, I should drink more water and sit down for a while...
..and the use 50 billions ATPs to get up.
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