Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Me? Big Bully?

I underestimate the little rascal. Some of you may already know this, but pardon my lack, or rather non-existent experience with babies.

Babies are NOT stupid as they look sometimes (see picture). There are a lot going on in their little devious mind, their massive neural activity is probably enough to light a bulb *ttrrrring* which symbolises ideas like "Eh, why don't I empty all the drawers and perform 'stock-taking' of the household inventory" which by the way, it's his favourite pastime.

Being inexperienced, I recently learnt that a barely-walking drool machine is 'bullying' me, as auntie put it, "Ta chi fu ni ah!" Why? M-A-N-J-A. I am not stern. I let him take advantage of my affections. I carry him whenever he wants me to, ALL day. I don't have big fierce eyes to glare at him when he sticks his little finger into the electrical power slot. I don't have strong commanding voice to lecture him when he sticks his little finger into the toilet bowl. But now I have, and armed with a feather duster. Then there comes the inevitable question... spare the rod? spoil the child? Or use the rod, seksa the child kao kao?

Most Westerners would use time-out, and maybe the 'I WANT an apology (british accent)' and explain to the little devil why he is being punished. Asians get beaten up, with whatever mummy gets her hands on, or sometimes WITH the hands themselves, AND THEN explain why the little devil is beaten, or sometimes no explanation at all. In fact, kena beaten for no reason also got. Like gangsters beating up the wrong guy (true story in Seremban), I wonder if those moms with 8 kids sometimes make that mistake, you know, beat beat beat, then alamak , wrong kid!

So, my disciplinary scheme will be based on stages of sin. Right now, since he still has wobbly knees and goes mmamammdaadadadada, I will use stern voice and distraction method, you know, like when he plays with wires, I will say NO pulling on the wires, and pull him away and distract him with porn. Hahahaha, gotcha. I kid! I kid! Yah, something like that. When he is older, and IF violence is required, I will use a wooden ladle to whack him. This method was used by a good friend's sister of mine who is living in the States. SO, some westerners/western-thinking moms DO use the rod. The rationale behind this is, never use your hands to hit a child, hands are for loving. And you don't have to use a wooden ladle, it can be a shoe, a cha-kiak, a leather belt, or anything leather.. wait, that sounds S&M, anything that looks harmless, feather duster being the most popular, can beat and dust his toys at the same time.

But all mothers agree, the person who hurts the most are themselves. It'll never be easy, especially the first time. But we do anything to bring our children to the righteous path. Aaa-mmeeenn.


No comments: