Monday, May 14, 2012

Men have...

...penile advantage. It is a privilege boys are born with and will carry it for the rest of their lives. It's like a golden supreme VIP card for life. No application or renewal required. It is just automatic. ESPECIALLY in Asia. ESPECIALLY the generation before... this generation.

With this membership of the penile supremacy club, His Majesty will enjoy the following privileges and immunities:

1. Household care is not his core responsibility. If he does help out with some housechores, he is a Westerner, or they live in a Western country. Or it is to repay some spiritual karma he owes from his past lives. A man's place is not in the kitchen, unless he is Jamie Oliver or that hot sexy Anthony Bourdain.

2. Childcare involves mostly play, roughplay, tickleplay, holding the kid upside down, watching TV together and handing the kid a smartphone installed with many games. If he cleans up his baby's poop soiled butt, it is to repay some spiritual karma as well.

3. If he falls sick, he can rest and sleep all day in the room WITHOUT disturbances. And be served porridge and medication. On the contrary, if a mother falls sick, she still drags her body out of bed because the kids are incessantly harrassing her for this and that.

4. When planning for a trip, all he does is approve or disapprove. The wife will do the research, book the most ideal and cost-effective accomodation, arrange transportation, book flights, buy travel insurance and a map.

5. When travelling, he loads and unloads the packed luggages, and drive. If not driving, then he's just the bag boy. The wife will pack EVERYTHING in an organized manner, unpack upon arriving at destination, repack everything and unpack everything at home after the trip. Including the baby stuff.

6. When quarelling, he can just take off to have a drink with his friends at their favourite bar. He can confide in his friends or the bartender, or just chill and cool down. She, on the other hand, cannot just take off and leave her kids unattended, or the dishes unwashed in the sink. She would just have to bear with it, or release the anger fumes while doing the dishes and putting the kids to bed. And then fume more, when she's alone in bed while he is out drinking.

7. The corporate world out there. Nuff said.

How many of these are true?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Ally, I enjoyed reading your blog, but I disagreed with you all men behaved like you describe excepted on the "Fall Sick" part. I am neither a westerner nor living in western country. I am a father with 2 boys & I don't have a maid at home. I help my lovely wife to mop my house floor whenever she can't make it or our part time maid was not in as per schedule agreed. I will help to bath my younger son or clean him after his "Big Business" whenever she is too busy with other things. I help my younger son with his dinner whenever possible & keep him busy when my wife help my elder son to do his homework or prepare for his exam in the evenning. Sometimes I even wake up in the morning say 3 or 4am to make milk for my younger son when he would like to has one. No doubt I do not know how to cook, I would help to replenish the cooked water supply at home by boiling water and refill it. Last but not least, I pack my own belongings whenever come to traveling and I can pack better than her....:-) Anyway, this does not mean I do not appreciate her great contribution to the family, I knew it very well without her my life will never be the same. Would like to wish every mother of the world a belated "Happy Mother's Day!".

Ally said...

Kudos to you! You are probably a rare breed! Hahahah. Those are general in nature, my husband do settle the kids when I'm occupied, but housechores-wise, we have a maid. However, before we had a maid, I was the one who had to do everything most of the time! Unlike our father's generation, men are getting more 'domesticated' now, but still not to the level where it is in their heart and soul, you know what I mean?

wie said...

Although I'm not married, I kinda know what you mean. Really :-D

Lokman said...

Ally,
Love your blog and your posts! I do agree that most men are like that but there are also ones who cook and clean (well although they don't do it the way we want them to). My partner and I share the chores. If he cooks, I'll wash up and vice versa. I usually trick him into doing that by saying his cooking is better than mine. Haha!